okay.. so here i am in "big bucks" a coffee shop owned by big foot (the place where JP works) with war surfin the net..

lemme let you all in on what has happened to me lately in cebu.. (not what i expected mind you!! not one itsy bitsy bit..)

Saturday:
1. got to cebu at around 2:30 pm.. noticed red spots on my arms..
2. got to the hotel at around 4 pm (itching in the cab)..
3. went to have dinner at ayala mall.. ate at a persian resto (persian palate).. lassie!! yummy!!! (itching while walking)..
4. went to tha parlor near the hotel to get my nails done..
5. nearly got "picked up" by a guy in a BMW on my way back to the hotel (darn guy!! do i look like a hooker?!! i was wearing mojos, cargos and a racer back for friggin sake!!) (i don't think a hooker dresses like that!! hmfp!!.. well atleast even if i've got allergy all over, guys still find me attractive!! LOL)
6. got back to the hotel and started itching (again)..
7. went to bed at around 10pm and noticed that my "red spots" where uhmm.. spreading..

Sunday:
1. woke up at 7 am.. red spots super itchy..
2. Aunty Linda and JP passed by the hotel..
3. Aunty Linda brought me to the doctor (prescribed anti allergy meds)..
4. Nearly fainted on the way back to Aunty's house (JP and War went ahead to the house while Aunty and I went to the doctor)
5. Had lunch at Aunty's house and rested there till around 3:30pm
6. Had a DVD marathon at the hotel..
7. Had delicious pizza (white sauce), large fries and a quarter pounder for dinner..

Monday:
1. still itching..
2. watched the oscars with war..
3. waiting for JP at bigbucks so that we can all go to the jars of clay concert..(yahhooooo!!)

well.. as you can see.. what a way to start my friggin vacation.. the doctor told me not to eat chicken.. seafood.. eggs.. or anything that could trigger the allergy!! waahhh!! this is not fun.. not fun at all!! i just hope and pray that i'll be better by wednesday.. we plan to spend the day at moalboal.. haaaayyy..

ok.. that's enough.. till next time then..ciao!!

yes.. i can be a real bitch if i wanted to..
so don't friggin play around with my feelings..

i have lost patience and if you don't mind i would like to move on..

so get out of my friggin life!

i tried my best to win you.. but i never did.. all you gave me were half spoken promises that never did come true.. and now when i finally have the courage to drift away.. you decide to suddenly show interest again.. that's what i hate about you.. i hate it when you succeed in making me feel this way..

i guess i will never understand you.. call me a fool for actually falling for you.. to you i guess it was all just a game.. a game to see how many fish you can actually catch in your net.. it's sad to admit.. but yes.. i got caught.. stupid! stupid! stupid me! (bangs head on PC)

i don't give a dang about the CD you supposedly created for me.. i already have those songs.. long before you even met me.. i just said that i wanted it 'coz i liked you.. all the times i asked you about it had a hidden meaning.. i was actually saying "i want to see you".. but did you read between the lines? i don't think so..

i will not allow you to treat me this way anymore.. i deserve better.. i just wish now that i never met you.. my life would have been less complicated.. but hey! that's what life is all about.. complications..

thanks though for those moments wherein you made me feel special (i can't help but wonder now how many of us felt that way..)

i just ask you to stop this.. 'coz i'm afraid that i might fall into your net again..

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war and i are off for cebu tomorrow.. it's the only thing i've been looking forward to lately.. only a couple more hours.. i just wish it were that easy to erase you from my life..

hmmm.. 3 days to go and i'm off to cebu.. war and i got our flight rescheduled for an earlier date so instead of the 28th of Feb, we'll be off on the 26th.. 9 whole days of pure, relaxing, sun and fun.. not to mention 9 days of not having to pretend (nuninuninu).. i'm sick and tired of it.. i'm just about this close to screaming my head off "^&^%$#&%$!!!!!!)

ok.. so had a pretty great week.. i had my ups and downs.. picked up JP from the airport last saturday (feb.12).. he spent the whole week here in manila with his SO war.. if love had a smell you could smell them (war and jp) from miles away.. hehehe.. i had been up the whole day but i still had my reserved energy for my dose of xaymaca.. i was pretty suprized that the place wasn't as full as it usually is, given that it's a saturday night.. then it hit me that everyone else was in roxas for the valentines thingy..

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i've decided to take up my MA's at UP.. i plan on taking up SPED.. thanks to skye i finally have something to look forward to.. my life is slowly clearing up..

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had a filzam reunion last friday (feb. 18).. met up with peeps from kitwe, mufulira and kalulushi (i think).. most were from kitwe though.. met up at chicken bacolod (metro walk) then headed off to phi bar so that we could give in to les' request for us to check out his bar..







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went to UP's fairplay (feb. 19) with war and JP.. met up with skye after her class then stayed there till around 2 am.. note to self: never ever ever ride the octopus thingy again!!!

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finally.. i've completed my "things to buy for my cebu trip" list..
i got my self board shorts.. a new bikini.. a pair of flip flops.. tanning lotion.. shades..
looks like i'm all set to go now..

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i could really use this time to think about things.. arrrgghhh!! can someone just!! haaaaayy.. whatever.. it's like i have this big "L" stuck on my forehead..

had a blast last saturday at Xaymaca..
more than 5 bands played during that night (coffee break island, hemp republic, reggae mistress, milagros dancehall, etc..) and they were all soooo good! man! that was the best night ever I had at xaymaca! (too bad we didn't get to finish it though.. 'twas already 2:30 and there were still like 3 bands scheduled to play but we were already too pooped to stay)..
it was like a "tribute" for bob marley..
we celebrated his "supposedly" 60th birthday..
the place was jam packed as usual and i met up with a couple of friends..
if i were to describe that night using one line of a song it would be "touch me once and you'll know it's true.." (wink wink)
ahh basta..
i had fun..
loads of fun (grins)..
now that was the "sugar" part of my week..

sunday, met up with pao then we went to ada's first birthday party..
she is such a beautiful child..
blessed with a family that really loves her and a whole other bunch of people too.. my prayer for ada is that she grows into a woman after God's heart and that she would be strong and full of life..

monday was so so..

tuesday..
i was interviewd for one of jfk foundation's projects..
something to do with our kind of company and BDO's..
they were gonna air it on tv i think and during their campus tours and campaigns for their training thingy..
they're targeting it for end of this month..
just in time for those who'll be graduating from college..
i was asked to go to work wearing something formal..
businessy like..
i was like "can a pair of jeans pass off as formal?!"..
i did some negotiating till they allowed me to wear a "smart casual" attire instead..
i was like who would actually believe that WE wear formal businessy attires to OUR kind of work?!

so there..
i went to work all dressed and preppy (soo different from my usual cargo pants, mojos and baby tees) and all ready to face the camera with a smile (hmm.. i wonder how the interview's gonna turn out.. i hope they reeeaaalllyyy edit it.. wouldn't want the whole population watchin me then makin fun of me after..i even had a "dry run" with dadi gibs before the shoot so that i had an idea of what to say during the interview! hehehe)

then i was asked to like "entice" the soon-to-be-graduates to join our company..
i was like whhaaatt? that's not in the script!!
so i had to go and make up this "enticing" thingy so it took a couple of re-shoots till i finally got what i wanted to say right..

can't wait to see the finished product..
dadi gibs wants to see the "un-edited" version..
maaannn.. i bet that would give all of my officemates gas after they watch it..
it was fun though..
atleast i still kinda get to use some stuff i learn't during my college days :p

hmmm..
that was basically the "spice" that was added to my normally boring life here on earth..

20 days left and i'm off to cebu.. woohoo!!

i'm not my usual bubbly self today..
i guess i never learn..
this will always be a vicious cycle..
and me never learning..
always giving in to the hope that this may be it..

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i'm getting tired of this..
in time i will probably just forget and move on..

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don't say that everything will be fine 'coz that's not what i want to hear right now..
don't feel sorry for me or feel obliged to do something to help me..
i can handle this on my own..
it's a struggle with my feelings..
only i can help myself..
and right now i don't wanna do that..

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i just wanna be allowed the time to wallow in what i'm "wallowing in" right now..
i deserve this time of "wallowing"

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well it's bob marley's birthday tomorrow..
happy birthday bob.. and may you rest in peace..
thank's for all the beautiful songs you left for us to listen to and to love..
these songs make me relax and i just drift to a different world whenever i listen to them..
you've touched the different emotions in your songs..
and that's what makes you a legend..

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i'm off to xaymaca tomorrow..
according to skye all 5 bands will be playin 'coz it bob's birthday..
i hope this makes me feel better..

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dang! i need a friggin vacation!!

war and i got our Cebu tickets the other day.. we took advantage of Cebu Pacific's promo wherein you get a round trip ticket for like less than 3k (it's on a first come, first served basis)..

we're gonna stay in there for 7 days and 6 nights.. we booked a hotel.. real affordable but very cosy (according to jp)..

we'll catch the jars of clay concert on the 28th then beach galore for me!!!! why just me? 'coz you'd have to tie war up and practically drag her to the beach.. that's how much she looooves the sun, sea and sand (hehehe)..

we'll be meeting up with a couple of officemates too when we get there.. dugs and herb won this raffle thingy at the office wherein the prize is a trip for two to Cebu and they get to stay at shang mactan.. all expenses paid.. with pocket money too (cool huh?!)

so atleast mid week i'd have some beach buddies!! ( i wonder if i can crash over at their hotel for a couple of days :p)

i also plan on meeting up with some filzams while i'm there..

the Tesches' work there so i'll prolly meet up with mike and mark and catch up on things.. it's been.. uhmm.. 11 years?

well.. were all grown up now.. mike and i used to play golf and rollerblade together when we were younger.. we spent most of the time together coz we had no choice.. there were no other kids close to our age in our town so we got stuck with each other (ahahaha)..

mark i know is my sister malaika's age.. i didnt get to hang out much with him then.. he was too "cool" to be seen with the little 'uns..

now i chat with him once in awhile.. so it'll be great to see them again..

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ok.. so i have like 3 weeks to get my stuff together.. things i need to buy.. in other words i want:

1. a new Bikini or tankini..
2. a pair of flip flops..
3. a new pair of shades..
4. tanning lotion..
5. a beach bag..
6. board shorts..

i'll think of more stuff in the coming days.. now for my "draft" itinerary proposal to war:

Feb 28: Tour the city.. Jars of Clay concert..
March 1: Beach..
March 2: Beach..
March 3: Beach..
March 4: Meet up with Dugs and Herb.. Beach..
March 5: War's birthday (Beach? hehehe)
March 6: Flight back to manila at 4am :(

I wonder if war will approve! bwehehehe :p

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i hope that my week long vacation in Cebu will do me good.. i need to get away from here.. i don't know what i feel.. i don't know whether to be angry.. thankful.. depressed.. happy.. blessed.. all i know is that i just have to go..

sometimes i just get soooo tired of all of this.. arrgghhhh!!

i hate to admit this to myself but yes.. i am one confused.. striked out girl..